And 3, 2, 1...

Today was the orientation at my college for student teaching.

I was very nervous going into this because today I was going to be assigned to a supervising teacher. This person will come to observe me teach and pretty much be my touchstone in this adventure, so it mattered to me a great deal who I might get. I had my hopes for a couple of the teachers I adored most during my time in school, but found that they were both not options right now. I wasn't sure who I  might get, and being me - I was worried about it.

I won't name my supervisor here because I have promised to keep these things private. It is however someone I have worked with before. Someone I very much like, but went into our meeting wondering how well we really synced up ideologically. I came out of the meeting feeling better about it than I expected.

She (I'll say she because all the supervisors are she) said something during the course of our meeting which resonated with me very strongly.

We were talking about working with our cooperating teachers, and how to handle differences in our approach and theirs. She said (in effect) we've all been working so hard, for so long, we've all been learning different things from different teachers and working hard at reconciling these ideas with our own feelings. This experience is about learning, taking what is modeled for us, what we've read and trying to make it ours.

Lets just say that this statement made me feel so much better. Trust me, I'm still terrified about all of this. But the statement made me feel, a little safer.

Driving home tonight I tried to start processing all of this. I live in the city, and therefore I park on the street. My street has one of those alternate day parking situations, so I generally am very preoccupied when I come home at making sure that I'm not in a place where I will get a ticket the next morning. Student teaching will change all that, I will need to be gone every morning before 9am when the parking police come out looking.

So, tonight when I came home, I could park anywhere I wanted. This made it all a little too real, so I'm giving myself the rest of the night off. Watching a silly moving, working on knitting a hat for myself and tomorrow I will sleep in for probably the last time until May.

Well, Monday is the first day. Think good thoughts for me....